Meat Turtles

A cow-orker’s wife was out of town for the week (obviously!) and he and his seven buddies decided to do some “man cooking” for poker night.

The result: Meat Turtles for dinner and Bacon-Wrapped Bananas for dessert.

…it was mostly a wing-it situation that turned out surprisingly well – which I attribute to man’s innate ability to cook meat

As most FSWC fans know, “man cooking” typically starts with a classic bacon weave. Take several strips of bacon and weave them into a, um…weave pattern. Top the bacon weave with approximately two pounds of ground beef.

Step 1

This isn’t some shy turtle hiding in his shell – add some hot dogs for arms, legs and a head!

Meat Turtle with Arms and Legs

Step 2

Pretend you’re a real chef and add some zest.

Meat Turtle with zest on top

Step 3

Wrap the bacon around the meat, arms and legs to create the “shell”. Then put the raw Meat Turtles on baking pans and cover the top with aluminum foil so that the meat bakes without burning the bacon.

Meat Turtles in the oven

Step 4

Bake at 400 degrees until the meat is cooked then remove the foil and drop the temperature down to 325 for the last 10 minutes to crispify the bacon and give the Turtle some color.

“There was so much grease we had to stop half way through to drain the pans.”

While the Turtles are baking let’s start making dessert. Wrap some bananas in bacon.

Bacon Wrapped Banana

Step 5

Toss the bananas in the oven until the bacon is cooked.

Meat Turtles Baking with Bananas

Step 6

What FSWC concoction would be complete without some cheese!?

Meat Turtles with Cheese

Step 7

Time to eat!

Meat Turtles and Beer

Step 8

Seven men. Four Meat Turtles. Three Bacon-Wrapped Bananas. Add beer and scotch to taste. The only thing left was half of a Meat Turtle which was eaten the next day.

“We were all surprised at how good they were and we all felt pretty damn good afterwards….”

Good thing cow-worker’s wife was gone for a week – I imagine it would take at least that long to get the smell out of the house!

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